Do you feel out of touch with your spouse?
Are you tired of arguments that don’t seem to save anything?
Do you need help reconnecting in your relationship?
Does a lack of intimacy leaving your feeling dissatisfied with your marriage?
Relating to people is often difficult. Relating to our partners, after years of relationship challenges, can be even more difficult. Both new and long married couples sometimes struggle to connect with one another. Over time, this leads the relationship to a breakdown in communication and understanding. Maybe you feel that your inability to connect has led to a lack of love and intimacy.
Marriage Counseling Works!
Cognitive Interpersonal Therapy: Effective Couples Counseling
I have been working with couples for many years, to reignite mutual love and develop skills of communication. I use a type of couples therapist called Cognitive Interpersonal Therapy (CIT). Using CIT, I assist couples in becoming much closer and loving toward one another. CIT, created by Dr. David Burns, is a model of therapy in which each person in the relationship takes responsibility for their own thoughts, feelings, and behaviors in a relationship.
As a couples counselor, I can help you and your spouse improve your relationship by learning to communicate more clearly.
It’s not about who is “right”
I know it’s hard to give up being right. You see things from a certain point of view and want your romantic partner to see what you see. In the moment, arguments feel so important. It feels critical that you convince your spouse of something.
In marriage counseling, one of my first goals is to hep you give up being “right” or trying to change your partner. I know this is really, really difficult. You’ve spent so long in unhelpful arguments and the things you have been saying all along feel really important. In fact, they often are important. But the key to saving your relationship? It’s having the courage to give up being right and instead learn to be vulnerable with your partner again.
Being right won’t save your marriage. Instead, learning to communicate better, let go of resentment and reconnect will help make lasting change.
As a couple, you’ll learn to be:
- Interested, rather than being interesting
- Understanding of their partner, rather than demanding to be understood
- Assertive, rather than being aggressive
- Strengths-focused, rather than being fixated on partner deficits
- Aware of their own triggers, rather than controlling of others
My three step plan for couples therapy success:
- Assess: Take time to understand what the major issues are and how they have been derailing the relationship.
- Plan: create goals and pathways to move forward to a more intimate future.
- Action: use highly effective methods to create new thoughts, emotions, and behaviors around problem areas.
Premarital Counseling in Cincinnati
In addition to working with couples who have been married or in a committed relationship for many years, I also work with couples considering or about to enter marriage.
It’s normal to wonder if you and your partner are compatible and it’s commendable that you and your fiancé want to strengthen your relationship before saying I do. When I see couples for pre-marital counseling, we start with an online relationship check up from the Gottman Institute. We then go through your report together and identify areas of your relationship that need strengthening. By identifying and addressing these parts of your relationship early on, you can start off with a strong, happy marriage.
Relevant Blog Posts on Relationships & Marriage
As a couples therapist, I am always looking for ways to help people improve their relationships. One way I do this is through keeping a blog where I often share tips about relationships & marriage. Here are a few blogs I’ve written on these topics:
- 3 Tips to Bring Romance Back Into Your Relationship or Marriage
- The Impact of Grief on a Relationship
- How Sex May Change During Pregnancy & After Birth
- How to Tell Your Partner About a Past Sexual Assault
- Casual Sex: Good or Bad for Mental Health?
- How to Get the Most out of Couples Counseling
- Balancing Power in Your Relationship
- 3 Ingredients for a Happy Marriage
- When to Come to Marriage Counseling: Getting the Timing Right
- How to Improve Intimacy with Your Partner
Begin Couples Counseling in Cincinnati, OH
You don’t have to get stuck in a cycle of negative communication and unhelpful arguments. I see couples every day at my Cincinnati, OH based counseling office. I am an experienced couples therapist and enjoy helping people make lasting change in their relationships.
If you are ready to reconnect with your romantic partner, let go of old resentments and bring intimacy back into your relationship, I want to help. I have had the privilege of working with couples of many different ages, orientations, religious traditions, and ethnicities. It would be a privilege to work with you and your loved one to create a new future. Please contact me today to set up an intake appointment and begin couples counseling.
Other Counseling Services
If you and/or your partner decide on individual therapy instead, I offer additional mental health services including anxiety treatment, counseling for infidelity & affair recovery, relationship counseling & marriage coaching for retired couples, cognitive behavioral therapy for depression and career counseling. I help a wide range of people in the Cincinnati area and look forward to exploring how counseling can help you live your best life.
Still Unsure if Couples Counseling is for You?
I know it can feel intimidating to come in for couples counseling. Especially if you haven’t been to therapy for other emotional or mental health issues in the past. I try to make the process as painless as possible for you. Consider checking out my Frequently Asked Questions page or contact me with other questions.